00:00:03:08 - 00:00:17:20
Chris
Hello and welcome to the Ending Body Burnout Show. We are your host Chris and Fili, co-founders of a multi-award winning functional medicine practice serving busy people with energy, mood and gut issues. While busyness.
00:00:17:20 - 00:00:25:01
Filly
Addictive doing, people pleasing and perfectionism might be the norm, it's not normal and it's a major contributor to health issues.
00:00:25:02 - 00:00:38:07
Chris
Our goal with this show is to give you a holistic root root cause approach to healing your body so that you don't have to continue doctor or diet hopping or popping a gazillion supplement hoping something might stick.
00:00:38:08 - 00:00:46:13
Filly
So get ready to heal your body, get your spark back deeply, connect with yourself, and step into the life of your dreams.
00:00:46:14 - 00:00:57:01
Chris
Let's dive in.
00:00:57:03 - 00:01:33:08
Filly
Hello! Welcome to the podcast. Today we have another super special episode where we're interviewing another of our clients, the wonderful Mel, who rewired chronic fatigue, anxiety, and depression and is now living her best life. Three years ago, before Mel reached out to us, she experienced a huge crash in her energy, mental health, immunity and gut during perimenopause and this came after many years of pushing herself.
00:01:33:08 - 00:02:09:09
Filly
So even before she got to perimenopause, she talks about already feeling quite burnt out, stressed, pushing, pushing, overriding her body signals. And when perimenopause and post menopause came along, she couldn't pretend or push anymore. Her body said no and at her worst, she was hospitalised for severe anxiety and depression. And now, fast forward to today. She is leaving her best life travelling, going on adventures and deeply surrendering into being.
00:02:09:15 - 00:02:40:16
Filly
So I'm really excited for you to hear Mel's beautiful story. It's been an absolute joy working with Mel Inside Out ending body burnout method and these real life stories are super special. I call them evidence collecting evidence that healing is possible, and the more that you can hear and see this, the more it becomes possible for you. So we are so incredibly grateful to the amazing Mail for coming on the show today to spread hope and healing with others.
00:02:40:18 - 00:03:04:02
Filly
And if you really resonating with Mel's story and the work that she did inside our method to get the results that she now has, and you're seeking a deep, holistic, root to root cause approach to your healing, now is your time. Doors are opening to our ending body burnout method on the 17th of June, which is next week at the time of this episode.
00:03:04:02 - 00:03:28:00
Filly
Drop dropping. So if you're interested, go to the show notes and pop your name down on the waitlist. The benefit of doing that is you will get access 48 hours before the doors officially open. We only have limited spaces because our program does include one on one support, so we can only take so many clients in and serve them at a time.
00:03:28:02 - 00:03:51:08
Filly
Also, being on the wait list and if you join up early, you do get over $500 worth of early bird bonuses. So just head on down and click that link and if you are interested. But you're like, I'd still like to learn a bit more. We do have our free Rewire Your Brain to End Body Burnout Coaching Week happening next week as well.
00:03:51:08 - 00:04:22:09
Filly
So we've got four workshops that take you through our essentially our method to helping our clients rewire not just their brain, but their whole self to end their body burnout. So please come along. It's going to be amazing. We've had people now come to these specific series, and the feedback of the people who come along to the Rewire Your Brain workshops is just so heartwarming.
00:04:22:09 - 00:04:37:14
Filly
People are experiencing real shifts in the workshop, so you definitely want to be there. Okay, let's go into today's episode.
00:04:37:16 - 00:04:50:18
Chris
Welcome, everybody, to this episode of the Anybody Burnout show. Today we are joined by our client, Mel. Welcome, Mel. Thanks for joining us on the podcast today.
00:04:50:20 - 00:04:53:05
Mel
Thanks for having me. It's good to be here.
00:04:53:07 - 00:05:20:11
Filly
Yay! We are so, so excited because you have had the most beautiful and I'd also say challenging healing journey. And I think we spoke ages ago around. And like Mel, you'd be so such a good person to have our podcast to share your story. And I think back then you were like, not yet, but today is the day.
00:05:20:11 - 00:05:38:12
Filly
And I think so many people will gain so much value and insight and inspiration from the work that you have done to essentially become your own self healer. So thank you for being brave enough to come and share your story.
00:05:38:14 - 00:06:04:00
Filly
Okay, so let's dive in to Prior to working with us inside the Ending Body Burnout method, can you just explain how you were feeling, what symptoms you were struggling with, how it was affecting your life, what season of life you're in as well? Because I think that that played a big part into the burnout and the mental health issues that really erupted.
00:06:04:02 - 00:06:43:13
Mel
Yeah, yeah it did. I think for me, like the full on menopause symptoms started around three years ago. And from there I sort of tried mainstream medical. I tried natural paths, supplements, diets, cutting out dairy, sugar, alcohol, caffeine, gluten, all the things. I tried hypnosis, NLP, counselling therapy. At one stage I'd become so unwell, I was hospitalised.
00:06:43:13 - 00:07:09:03
Mel
I chose to be hospitalised for acute mental health treatment. Yet all of that. I was still not feeling myself. So, in the end, I, I thought, I need to do something. I can't live the rest of my life like this. There must be answers. There must be something or someone that can help me. So that's sort of where I was at.
00:07:09:07 - 00:07:30:05
Mel
And I was very unwell with fatigue and depression. Anxiety. And just being overwhelmed and like, I felt like I had mountains of stuff to do, but I couldn't do anything. Yeah. So it was. Yeah. Not the not the best place to be.
00:07:30:07 - 00:07:55:08
Filly
And is that how the pyramid of symptoms showed up for you as well? Because like a lot of women, especially if they haven't been in that space yet, it's kind of like hot flushes, night sweats, can't sleep at night, but it really like it can either exacerbate pre-existing symptoms or it can show up in in different ways that we don't classically think about as perimenopause, which also means you can fall in the cracks a bit.
00:07:55:10 - 00:08:24:23
Mel
Yeah, definitely. And it wasn't until I've I've heard stories again and again. Now that women are speaking out about huge mental health challenges when menopause in perimenopause and more so that transition over to menopause. I had no idea that that could happen because it hasn't happened to anyone around me. And I thought I'd got away with the menopause symptoms pretty well.
00:08:24:23 - 00:09:03:19
Mel
I hadn't put on lots of weight, I wasn't having hot flushes like my friends, and then all of a sudden it was just like, my world crumbled and the anxiety took over and it all star. Remember, it started with hot flushes. So it was all very clear how that started. And I think feeling burnt out anyway, from a busy life and then having that on top and having pre-existing health conditions, it really became a perfect storm of symptoms.
00:09:03:19 - 00:09:06:01
Mel
And burnout was, yeah, full on.
00:09:06:02 - 00:09:38:17
Filly
Yes, yes we or when this drops, I think it was 2 or 3 episodes back, but we had Doctor Carrie in to talk about perimenopause and she's like far out. There's a massive connection between burnout, stress and then like that foundation, that dysfunctional foundation, leading to perimenopausal symptoms just exploding because you can go through perimenopause without having any major symptoms, and then you stop your period and you're in post menopause.
00:09:38:19 - 00:10:18:21
Filly
And what not. A lot of people do know is that perimenopause can last for 12 years. So that's like that's a long that's over a decade of many years where if you are struggling with a lot, whether it's a flare up or new health issues, and especially for women who might still be getting a regular cycle to know, it can be hard to connect those dots together, that it's like actually you're transitioning into a different chapter in your woman life and all the things that have happened prior to that, like the patterns and the programming and the burnout and the busyness and the stress, it does create that perfect storm.
00:10:18:21 - 00:10:33:05
Filly
So I think the more that people are aware of that, then, you know, you can also think that I'm not just going crazy. It's not just all in my head. There's some real physiological stuff happening in my body is exacerbating how I'm feeling.
00:10:33:07 - 00:10:40:08
Mel
Yeah, exactly. And that that is probably,
00:10:40:10 - 00:10:44:03
Mel
Probably the.
00:10:44:05 - 00:11:03:12
Mel
The realisation I had down the track was that this is not just something in my head or a flaw in my personality or some sort of weakness. It's actually my physical body reacting to all the changes as well as the burnout. And yeah.
00:11:03:13 - 00:11:37:14
Filly
Yeah, and we'll get into the metaphysical side as well, because then it's also like an amazing euro pathways and the amygdala and the nervous system and the unconscious mind and everything is interacting with each other. And so if there's stuff from the past, the leaves, patterns, programming, past events still stuck in the system that also haven't been addressed, rewired, then it's like constantly sending danger signals to the physiology, to the adrenals, the brain, the hormones and symptoms of where people end up.
00:11:37:16 - 00:12:14:14
Filly
So so you mentioned you had tried a lot of things, and you got out of so after like, I guess, being hospitalised, you moved out of that, like deep survival despair into being able to function, but still not feeling optimal or still struggling with anxiety and depression and fatigue. Yeah, yeah. So what was the I guess, what was the thing that made you say yes to working with us inside the ending body burnout method, especially after trying a bunch of things and still not being where you want it to be.
00:12:14:15 - 00:12:23:21
Filly
Like still daily struggling with mental health, immune issues, fatigue.
00:12:23:23 - 00:12:43:10
Mel
From memory, I was thinking back, but I definitely discovered your book. That was where it started. And I read that and then I started listening to your podcast. And the more I listened, the more I thought, I really need to do this, I really need to give this a go. I just felt that, yeah, this is it.
00:12:43:10 - 00:13:14:03
Mel
And yeah. So I don't know what a background. And yeah, with looking at what you do, listening to more and more podcasts. And in the end I thought, I've got nothing to lose here. I've, you know, I've come this far. Let's just see what we can do. And my husband was on board as well, which was really good for him to be supportive and support me through the process as well.
00:13:14:05 - 00:13:40:19
Filly
It's always nice to have that support. I don't know if you remember, and maybe this was part of the presentation of like that low mood depression, low motivation, even though there was like things that you felt like you needed to do, but that very first console, it's like you were obviously there because there was enough of a belief that it's like, I'm going to give this a crack and see what happens.
00:13:40:19 - 00:13:47:19
Filly
But do you do you remember that there really wasn't a lot of conscious hope?
00:13:47:21 - 00:13:55:00
Mel
No. What was sort of yeah, I think.
00:13:55:02 - 00:14:19:13
Mel
It was almost like I got to a point of being burnt out trying things. Yeah. And. Yes and. Yeah. And it's like, oh, I, you know, let's just do this and see what happens and yeah, move on from going around. So I really felt like I was just going around in circles. Yeah. Or a bit like a rat on a wheel, I suppose I'd get so far.
00:14:19:13 - 00:14:27:13
Mel
And then I realised I'd be back at the start again. I thought, I'm really not dealing with what's really, really deeply going on in my body.
00:14:27:18 - 00:14:35:17
Filly
Yeah, that was just a part of you that was like, I think I can do it. I think I can lean in, I think I can get results.
00:14:35:19 - 00:14:41:12
Mel
Just that part that I guess didn't want to give up. Yeah. Not give up on life either.
00:14:41:13 - 00:15:05:16
Filly
Yeah. Yeah, I love that. And I think a big part of yours too, which is really, I guess the next question. So in our ending body burnout method, we have like the first step is answers. So getting clear on what body systems are burnt out, depleted, imbalanced, out of whack over growing so we can start supporting the physical body as we work on the deeper metaphysical root causes.
00:15:05:20 - 00:15:38:17
Filly
And when you prepared for our first initial console, you sent through all the things that you had done. It's like, I have got a gazillion love tests that I've done, and not just GP or medical specialist test you'd already been seeing. Like several nature pass functional medicine type practitioners. So you've done a lot of testing and you sent through all the protocols and I'm like, I think I know why mill is feeling a bit burnt out trying to get better because like, there's a lot of stuff.
00:15:38:19 - 00:15:58:23
Filly
And so what were your thoughts around the lab testing? Because essentially like that first session with me and then you were working one on one with Chris as well. But the first one with me was to look at. Well, are there any missing pieces from a body systems level, like are there any body systems that we haven't yet tested for or you haven't done?
00:15:58:23 - 00:16:23:00
Filly
And when I got all your data, I'm like, let's not do any more lab testing. Let's just focus on the information that we have, because there were some body systems that you hadn't quite addressed from a physical point of view, I guess. How did you feel around that? And also, are you happy to share what some of those imbalances were that showed up in your lab tests?
00:16:23:02 - 00:16:43:02
Mel
Yeah. Look, it was funny like when you said you didn't think we needed any more testing. There was part of me was like, oh, maybe we won't find that thing. But then there was another part like, oh, thank God, I don't have to do anymore. Like, there's just so much information and I feel like I'm not getting where I want to go.
00:16:43:02 - 00:17:04:15
Mel
So, yeah. And just knowing like that. Yes. My adrenals exhausted, my gut wasn't happy from this e-bow and different things showing up and.
00:17:04:17 - 00:17:34:05
Mel
It all pointed to burnout, but it was more okay if there's not one specific little thing that we have to deal with here. Let's just overall look at things holistically. And that was the other thing that drew me to what you do is that holistic approach that we're looking at from the mental, emotional and physical. So the metaphysical, all of it.
00:17:34:06 - 00:17:36:03
Filly
Yeah.
00:17:36:05 - 00:17:42:21
Mel
I thought, well, if we're dealing with everything, all those systems, something will come out of that.
00:17:42:22 - 00:18:09:07
Filly
Yeah. So interesting. We interviewed another client who actually her FSA went live today, Nica, and she said a very similar thing. She's, like, tried a bunch of stuff. I was super sceptical, but when I looked at like, how robust and holistic the method is, I'm like, surely if we're throwing everything at it, it's going to work.
00:18:09:09 - 00:18:32:06
Filly
And sometimes that can feel overwhelming for people as well. It's like holistic everything. But also we're dealing with a like many of our clients. And I think that you felt it when you first started working with us. You can't heal from body burnout in the way that you got to body burnout in the first place. So it's not kind of like, here's a gazillion things that you have to do all at once.
00:18:32:06 - 00:18:56:15
Filly
It's like, let's staged this in a really thoughtful, personalised way that's going to work for you so that you can relax into it. You can trust the process, might even start feeling a little bit joyful, or is full along the way as well. And essentially like that is a massive component that allows someone to heal. As we're working on all parts of you.
00:18:56:17 - 00:19:24:00
Mel
Yeah. That was definitely good for me because I was quite has, you know, burnt out and fragile when I started. And being able to pace that and know that I can just take little bites and feel my way through the process rather than having to go, go, go like my first instinct, as with everything, was like, right, I'm going to get into this, I'm going to get it all done.
00:19:24:00 - 00:19:39:19
Mel
And but then I learned that, no, that doesn't work. Just take it a little bit at a time and deal with where you're at. Yeah, don't sort of put that aside thinking I need to get to the next step. Yes, that was a big one for me.
00:19:39:20 - 00:19:59:22
Filly
Yeah. And yeah, that pattern like an essentially is a trauma response pattern to have. Like if I do all the things really fast, then I will get the result. And if I don't like, if I slow down, if I just maybe surrender a little bit, I'm a bit messy, a bit organic, a bit imperfect, I'll never get there.
00:19:59:22 - 00:20:38:19
Filly
And so it's like it's constantly I mean, I think for someone to be able to surrender into that, it's like there's enough intellectual knowledge that it's like, oh, okay, that makes sense. But also like your evidence starts building up as you start being different and you're healing different. And it's like. Oh, this is actually working for me. Even if it's micro initially or throughout the journey, there's still that build up of evidence that just allows the nervous system, the brain, unconscious mind, to relax and settle into developing a healthy and loving relationship with self rather than trying to fix self.
00:20:38:21 - 00:20:39:11
Filly
Yeah.
00:20:39:14 - 00:20:57:03
Mel
Yeah, that's the key. It's learning how to be kind to myself. Very good at being kind to other people. Everything and everyone around me. But kindness for myself was not something I had ever done. Really?
00:20:57:04 - 00:20:57:19
Filly
Yeah.
00:20:58:00 - 00:20:59:12
Mel
Yeah, at a deep level.
00:20:59:17 - 00:21:20:20
Filly
Yes, yes. And this takes us to the next step. So I always I get curious around, okay, there's some body system imbalances. Things are like, there's definitely some things that are burnt out. It's not just all in your head, but what led to the body systems burning out in the first place? What's the root cause underneath all of that?
00:21:20:21 - 00:21:52:09
Filly
That goes beyond just some lifestyle habits, which is important for some people. But I think for you, your diet was already dialled in. You know, you knew things about toxins and sleep hygiene and all that sort of stuff. So we really went that very level deeper into what we call the root root cause. So when someone's working through the metaphysical side of things, the aim is to look at all the patterns and then get to a root belief that is driving everything.
00:21:52:11 - 00:22:08:04
Filly
And a lot of that work you did with Chris in your one on one coaching sessions. Are you happy to share a bit about what that journey looked like for you, where you ended up at the Root, what it felt like when you got there?
00:22:08:06 - 00:22:52:12
Mel
Yeah. Yeah, it took a bit. And in the end, I was when I got to it, I thought, is that really it? And it came to being weak and unlovable, which came from early childhood. And I decided that's what I was. But every time Chris and I would catch up and I'd had some sort of glitch going on or not feeling great or anxiety had shown up, we would work through what was going on, what I was thinking, what I was believing about myself, what I was telling myself.
00:22:52:15 - 00:23:26:23
Mel
And it would always come back to that. It'd be like I'd get to the point, go, oh, of course that's what it is. Yeah. Yes, it's that. So it. Yeah. Having knowing that and then reprogramming that and knowing I guess knowing that you have that deep belief about yourself, you can be more aware of why you're behaving the way you are or the patterns and habits you have so you can consciously make changes.
00:23:27:02 - 00:23:28:16
Mel
Yeah. And rewire.
00:23:28:18 - 00:23:30:00
Filly
Yes.
00:23:30:02 - 00:23:43:07
Mel
Yeah. And yeah, the more you practice that, the better you get, the more you can pick yourself up. And I think just an example recently.
00:23:43:09 - 00:24:05:12
Mel
Was the day we were heading off for our holiday. We had to catch a flight from Brisbane and I had parking booked and everything. And what happened is the parking website redirected me unknowingly to a car park just away from the airport, and we end up running late for our flight. And I, I had a little a little tante.
00:24:05:14 - 00:24:26:12
Mel
I got cranky and in the end I, I, we got on the bus because we had to do a little bus shuttle over to the airport. And I got on the bus and I was just seething. And then I, it was like I had this moment like, what are you doing? This is not who you are. This is not who you want to be.
00:24:26:14 - 00:24:55:14
Mel
And I just came back to the present, back to myself. And I actually apologised to myself for being so cranky and putting myself through that and reframed. Right. Okay, we're going on this amazing adventure. And from there it just changed to happy, even though we're still running to get to the baggage check in. That was it. It just stopped.
00:24:55:19 - 00:24:58:12
Mel
I didn't dwell on it like I used to.
00:24:58:13 - 00:24:58:23
Filly
Yeah.
00:24:59:00 - 00:25:08:07
Mel
So that's me was a huge yes realisation that yes, it is working. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. Things are changing.
00:25:08:07 - 00:25:15:20
Filly
Yeah. Because in the past that with a spiralled UK in terms of it, we just set the tone for the rest of the holiday.
00:25:15:22 - 00:25:33:06
Mel
Yeah, yeah. Or at least the part of it. Yeah. It could have been, you know, before we met up because we're meeting up with other friends at the airport. My mood was fine by the time we met them, so it didn't affect them either. Yeah. So we were all happy and excited.
00:25:33:07 - 00:25:34:14
Filly
Yeah. Yes.
00:25:34:14 - 00:25:34:21
Mel
Yeah.
00:25:34:23 - 00:25:51:13
Filly
I love that. Can you paint a bit of a picture to in terms of how we can and lovable was affecting or causing the fatigue, the anxiety, depression?
00:25:51:15 - 00:26:26:05
Mel
Yeah. I think it goes back to a lifetime of proving that I'm strong, proving that I'm worthy by doing things and performing and seeking approval by being tough. And, you know, I can do it. Soldier through not giving myself the care. And when I say care, I mean just that simple kindness to self. The way I speak to myself.
00:26:26:07 - 00:26:35:02
Mel
I could go and have a massage or a manicure or my hair done. And yeah, that's nice, but it tastes back to yourself every day. That matters.
00:26:35:03 - 00:26:35:12
Filly
Yeah.
00:26:35:13 - 00:27:03:07
Mel
And that little voice pushed me and pushed me. I would push through illness. I'd push through whatever I had to push through to survive, to prove that I can do it. And before my second marriage, I was a single mum for eight years with one son, and I worked full time through that. And again it was very much proving to everyone that I could do it.
00:27:03:09 - 00:27:04:05
Mel
I'll be right.
00:27:04:06 - 00:27:04:21
Filly
Yeah.
00:27:04:22 - 00:27:20:06
Mel
And all of that wears at you over time. And for me, I could keep doing that and keep that pretence up until I think the menopausal symptoms came in.
00:27:20:08 - 00:27:20:23
Filly
Yeah.
00:27:21:01 - 00:27:26:03
Mel
And that was the wall. That's where I hit the wall. Yeah. It's like you're not going any further.
00:27:26:04 - 00:27:48:14
Filly
Yeah. It's like hormones dropping. Everything gets unmasked. Yeah, yeah. Which I imagine that it was like super frustrating at the time. But in hindsight now, do you have some some love and gratitude for that?
00:27:48:16 - 00:27:51:13
Mel
I do.
00:27:51:15 - 00:28:16:03
Mel
It's taught me a lot about myself. My husband and I much were close anyway, but we're it's really improved our relationship with that emotional connection and closeness as well. Yeah, I think in general I'm just a better person towards myself first and a lot calmer.
00:28:16:07 - 00:28:16:19
Filly
Yeah.
00:28:16:22 - 00:28:42:17
Mel
So yeah, it's yeah, I've learned a lot. And to change the way I talk to myself, the way I behave, the things that I do and how I do things will then ultimately prevent me going down that rabbit hole of burnout again if something happens.
00:28:42:19 - 00:29:16:03
Filly
Yes. And that's, that's the the ending. Like, I love words and ending when we were trying to decide, like, what do we call this program ending body burnout? I was really passionate about that because I'd been a practitioner in the past, that kind of like I thought I was giving root cause medicine, but it was kind of more band aid in a natural disguise, essentially, because I just kept seeing clients coming back, especially around Covid time, where it's like, what I thought, I thought you were healed.
00:29:16:04 - 00:29:46:06
Filly
I thought you were better. And they're like, I don't know why these symptoms are back, but when you can have that deep understanding around who you are, how you work the patterns, and you've actively worked to change them and rewire them, then the symptoms don't have to keep coming back to get your attention because you're being different. And, and like, that's a simple and as hard as it is hard because it can be hard to rewire.
00:29:46:09 - 00:30:20:08
Filly
But it is also a very simple process. And it can become easier when you really surrender into that and trust that you can change. Yeah. So what did it? What did it look like for you to rewire the deep belief and to start switching off symptoms? Like, were there any specific practices or coaching sessions or frameworks that really helped you?
00:30:20:10 - 00:30:26:13
Mel
I think really.
00:30:26:15 - 00:31:07:20
Mel
For me, I can't like there are quite a few different things Chris and I worked through together. Of course. Using affirmations and helping myself rewiring my beliefs that way. But then putting that into practice. And I think for me, I've because I've had the weekly appointments with Chris to catch up and have coaching that has allowed me to, I guess, fall down and get back up because we can talk about what's happening and look at, well, what what are you doing at the moment?
00:31:07:21 - 00:31:21:10
Mel
What's happening? How can we reframe that? Let's look at how you really want to be. What are you doing as opposed to being.
00:31:21:12 - 00:31:49:01
Mel
The big one for me is to be present and to actually just be. That's probably the biggest learning for me. And everything seems to come back to that. Yeah, if I can just be, then I can do what I want and have what I want. And again, our holiday just recently, like pulling myself up at the beginning and just being and then doing what I wanted to do.
00:31:49:03 - 00:32:11:14
Mel
And behaving the way I would have liked, which was to be happy and excited and someone fun to be around, rather than the cranky person who just had an issue with a car park. And that all led to doing really fun stuff and having fun and joy.
00:32:11:16 - 00:32:12:19
Filly
Yes.
00:32:12:21 - 00:32:50:05
Mel
So two weeks of a holiday. So yeah, I can't say there's a specific for me. It's more about. Yes, knowing the root cause, having your affirmations, reprogramming the neural pathways and then using the different tools you guys have online within the program to build my life the way I want it to be from here on in, and how I want to be.
00:32:50:07 - 00:32:53:20
Mel
How I want to play the game of life. Yeah.
00:32:53:21 - 00:33:19:08
Chris
I love it so much. How does it feel now, Mel, in your your nervous system, you know, like you've just gone on a on a significant trip. We talked about Japan and past are, past attempts to go over there as well. You know, like we talked about things like this, but how's your how's your nervous system feel now?
00:33:19:08 - 00:33:26:19
Chris
Like you've just done something significant. How are you feeling in your in yourself now?
00:33:26:21 - 00:34:10:01
Mel
I feel really good. Yeah. And as you mentioned, like, it's, I had I've had a couple of overseas trips where I've struggled with anxiety. I've come back feeling really drained and anxious. Not this time at all. I just felt. Oh. Mel's back. She's here. The real Mel. And. Yeah. No, I'm feeling great this time, I, I was sort of that was that little bit of me like, what's going to happen when I come home and we're away from all the fun, but, no, I've sort of slotted back in and as best you can when you come back from a fun holiday.
00:34:10:02 - 00:34:23:19
Mel
Yeah. But I think that whole buzz of the holiday and the warmth and friendship sort of come out of it as well, is something that will stay. So. Yeah.
00:34:23:20 - 00:34:36:04
Chris
How do you how do you imagine life being different in the future with, with this, this new way of being for yourself?
00:34:36:06 - 00:34:40:18
Mel
Yeah.
00:34:40:20 - 00:34:44:00
Mel
I see it.
00:34:44:02 - 00:35:13:01
Mel
As being open to more experiences. I mean, in the stage of life, I'm Matt. It's more about experiences for me. Like kids have grown up, they're all independent and we're sort of preparing for retirement. So for me, I think I want to be strong and healthy physically, mentally, emotionally so I can enjoy that and really get out there and live.
00:35:13:01 - 00:35:37:15
Mel
I don't want to sit in a retirement home wasting away. That's not what I see for the future. So yeah, so I see now I see that I can physically and my nervous system can handle also going on adventures and doing fun things. Whereas before I felt like I wasn't strong enough to do it.
00:35:37:17 - 00:35:38:11
Chris
Yeah.
00:35:38:12 - 00:36:03:22
Mel
So I just would avoid it. I'd shrink back and I'd be very reliant on Dirk for support, whereas now I feel much more confident in myself to do, to take on whatever opportunities come up. And I think that's really it. It's having the ability to take up opportunities when they arise as well.
00:36:04:00 - 00:36:11:18
Chris
Amazing, amazing. That's so cool. And so you're probably thinking,
00:36:11:20 - 00:36:23:09
Chris
Actually I'm thinking, what's what's next for you? What can you see as, as the next thing on the cards for for melon. Dirk.
00:36:23:10 - 00:36:55:05
Mel
Well, we do have there'll be more, more fun trips, for sure. We do have a little. It will be exciting. We're looking at developing a block of land and building units and renovating a house that's already on there. So as scary as that is, it's also exciting because I can be a bit creative with that, with colours and design and different things along the way.
00:36:55:07 - 00:37:31:18
Mel
So that's going to be a big, big undertaking for us, a big project over the next few years. Aside from, sort of will be working on selves out of our business. So there other guys underneath can take over as well. So that will open up more free time for us to do things. So yeah, I see many more adventures and fun activities rather than just working and slogging away.
00:37:31:20 - 00:37:32:02
Mel
Yeah.
00:37:32:03 - 00:37:34:10
Chris
That's so cool. That's epic. I think.
00:37:34:14 - 00:37:34:22
Filly
I love.
00:37:34:22 - 00:37:59:19
Chris
That you and I in some of our early coaching calls, we were talking about just this. I can't remember the exact words that we used or you use. Sorry, but it was like, what? What if this happens and what if, what if, what if this goes on? And what if, what if that and what if this and and and it was almost like there was, there was an early on paralysis.
00:37:59:19 - 00:38:20:17
Chris
But now now here you are. You're like it's like you've the floodgates are open. You can dream, you can imagine, you can do, you can do whatever the heck you want. Really. You can design a new the new renovations and all this sort of stuff. You can go to Japan. You can have have fun with your husband and with yourself.
00:38:20:17 - 00:38:24:10
Chris
This is it's pretty cool, I love it. I love this.
00:38:24:10 - 00:38:25:17
Mel
For you. Definitely.
00:38:25:23 - 00:38:50:01
Filly
So awesome. Were there any I'm sure there were some challenges. Everyone has challenges, but as you were working through the ending body burnout method and rewiring, whether that was physically, metaphysically, did you come up against any major challenges and how did you work through those?
00:38:50:03 - 00:38:53:05
Mel
Yeah, I.
00:38:53:07 - 00:39:06:08
Mel
Became a bit of a pattern like. At times I would I would be going really well for a while, and it was like as soon as I.
00:39:06:09 - 00:39:27:22
Mel
Got to a certain level of thinking, I'm progressing, I the anxiety would hit me and I think, well, what's going on? Why is this come back, it's not working. And that yeah, that was that was always tricky. But either I talked to you or Chris and he'd be like, wow, that's great.
00:39:28:00 - 00:39:33:16
Filly
I feel like, you know.
00:39:33:18 - 00:40:02:02
Mel
So. And in the end, like, we yes, we'd talk through whatever was going on and we'd get past the anxiety and deal with that. But it in the end I realised, okay, these little pressure tests come along. Yes, life isn't perfect all the time. So things come along that trigger you. It's about realising, I guess, being aware of that and dealing with them.
00:40:02:04 - 00:40:20:12
Mel
But I realised that after each one I had, I come out the other side and I think, oh, I feel even stronger than before. And that sort of kept happening along the way. So they were, they were simply, yeah, I don't know how else to say it was like.
00:40:20:14 - 00:40:29:09
Mel
Maybe my subconscious reorganising itself and finding its way and going, wow, this is unfamiliar. So I'm going to freak out now.
00:40:29:11 - 00:40:30:20
Filly
Yeah, yeah, a.
00:40:30:20 - 00:40:54:09
Filly
Hundred percent. I actually had a conversation with a newer client and she was having some breakthroughs, and then all of us, and it was just like very overwhelming to anxiety and physical health issues came raging back. And so sometimes, sometimes you can have a little bit of a yo yo experience where it's like broken through some big stuff.
00:40:54:09 - 00:41:19:12
Filly
It's like, wow, I feel so different. This is amazing. But, you know, those old neural pathways are pretty strong. So sometimes you can kind of rebound back to them if you allow yourself to feed into them. That's where people get stuck. And, you know, that's where people feel like I've gone back to square one. But actually, when you can see it from a macro lens of healing, that it's actually a sign of progress.
00:41:19:12 - 00:41:41:01
Filly
And there were some real things to like. There was every time the anxiety came back with vengeance, and it was kind of like a monthly cycle for three or so months. I think there was usually something that we could find underneath the surface where you had broken rapport, where you started, like feeding old beliefs or patterns, and when when you could identify that.
00:41:41:01 - 00:41:58:05
Filly
And I think the effective apology was really powerful for you. Like it's just like, oh, this is what I did. This is why I did it. Show some compassion, some love. What's a believable plan? It's unlikely that it's going to happen again, so that when I come through this, I'm going to be stronger. I'm going to have the tools.
00:41:58:05 - 00:42:18:07
Filly
I'm going to know what to do next time. Yeah. Over time, those, those blips or pressure tests where the anxiety came back, they just were getting less and less intensity, but also in duration. And I do remember the first time it happened, or maybe the second time I'm like, this is great, Mel.
00:42:18:07 - 00:42:22:09
Filly
And you're like, no, it's not. It's horrible. Like, no, no, no, no, no, no. This is.
00:42:22:09 - 00:42:34:15
Filly
A sign of progress. And when you move through this, yeah, just drink up those new neural pathways and it's going to become the new normal. On the other side of.
00:42:34:15 - 00:42:36:12
Filly
New novel.
00:42:36:14 - 00:43:06:07
Mel
I was a bit sceptical to start with. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. It definitely like looking back it Yeah. I've in the last six months so much has changed. And I think when I came back from Japan this in January from a ski holiday and I was unwell, physically unwell, the anxiety came back.
00:43:06:08 - 00:43:08:15
Filly
Bedtime had a colour blue.
00:43:08:16 - 00:43:10:04
Filly
Yeah, yeah.
00:43:10:05 - 00:43:35:17
Mel
Then I realised I had most probably had Covid because I lost my sense of taste completely for about three weeks once I realised that, okay, this is a physical thing and you need to rest, because I was feeling anxious because it was just so hard to get out of bed. I was so fatigued and once I let myself heal in the time it needed, it took three weeks.
00:43:35:19 - 00:44:06:18
Mel
I was okay and that was a difference for me than before would have been. You have to get up to get out of bed. This is happening. You can't stay in bed because you're going to fall back into a hole. And yeah, but yeah, yeah, I think that was that was really the last big one where I realised that the anxiety is not always a bad thing.
00:44:06:19 - 00:44:13:09
Mel
It's my body saying you're really, really tired and unwell. You need to rest so you can get on.
00:44:13:13 - 00:44:35:17
Filly
Yes. It's like a loving signal. Essentially. It's like, no, no, no, no. We know you listen to the anxiety. So here you go. Another piece of learning for you rest. You've got Covid. Yeah. And I think I remember we had a conversation around that time. I think you were actually in the flu. And this is really helpful for me.
00:44:35:17 - 00:45:07:09
Filly
So it might be helpful for a listener as well that when I realised that being whole and healed and well doesn't mean that you never have a sensation or you never get sick like we're going to get sick. Sometimes we might even break a bone. Sometimes, like there's acute sensations that will show up. And I think that that was an important learning for you as well, because you were attaching the fatigue from the sickness as like it's like, oh, I'm back here again.
00:45:07:09 - 00:45:32:14
Filly
And like, what if I can't get out this time? Like maybe like previously it was just a fluke. And so it's like, no, no, no, no. When we can just surrender into the fact that human beings catch a flu sometimes and that we give our bodies what it needs in that moment. Then like, not only do you recover from the acute illness quickly, but it doesn't lead to like this spiral of health anxiety.
00:45:32:14 - 00:45:33:10
Filly
Essentially.
00:45:33:14 - 00:45:35:13
Mel
Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
00:45:35:18 - 00:45:37:12
Filly
So that was awesome.
00:45:37:13 - 00:45:38:16
Filly
00:45:38:18 - 00:45:48:19
Filly
What do you feel was different about our ending body burnout method?
00:45:48:21 - 00:46:27:14
Mel
The difference with this is it covers all bases. So we can if if there is something seriously wrong physically, we can pull that out with testing and whatever and use whatever protocols need to be done to help that. But at the same time, you're also working on your metaphysical state, your mental health, and your emotional health. So the two work together because if you're really body and mind are really stressed, you're not going to heal doing protocols.
00:46:27:16 - 00:46:52:07
Mel
Yeah. As I found. Yes. So to me the difference is all of its integrated together and you can pace yourself to work through it. You've got within this program, you've got all the support you need, all the tools you need to use as you need.
00:46:52:09 - 00:47:02:09
Mel
So I think that is different. I know there's I've done sort of different.
00:47:02:10 - 00:47:29:03
Mel
Things. We do a certain amount of days or appointments and that's it and you're done slightly. That hasn't worked for me. Focusing on the physical alone definitely doesn't work. The two are so physical and mental and emotional are so all closely linked together that you really need to deal with all areas to be able to get to the bottom of it.
00:47:29:04 - 00:47:33:07
Mel
If you have had trouble getting well.
00:47:33:09 - 00:47:59:03
Filly
Yeah, yeah. So interconnected. And I think this is. Yeah, something that I'm really passionate about with how we practice natural medicine as well, because people end up in natural medicine, often because they've hit a roadblock with GP's or medical specialists. And essentially it's like we kind of poo poo on. It's like, oh, it's because it's a reductionist approach.
00:47:59:03 - 00:48:26:18
Filly
You go to a gastroenterologist, they only look at the gut, but they're not looking at how that's interacting with the brain or a psychologist, but that's not looking at how it's interacting with, I don't know, some other body system. But then in natural medicine as well, there's a lot of things that also give you a reductionist approach where it's like, this is the thing that's going to solve all the things, and this is the most important thing when it's like, hang on.
00:48:26:20 - 00:48:58:03
Filly
Like the whole of us is constantly communicating with all parts of us. So let's bring everything together. And I'm just constantly at or at how the physical body communicates to us, but essentially it's via the unconscious mind, nervous system and brain like that alone to is a lot of evidence that the two are so at like interconnected and are constantly playing out with each other.
00:48:58:05 - 00:49:02:15
Filly
Yeah, definitely. Okay.
00:49:02:17 - 00:49:27:11
Filly
So last question. If anyone has been listening to this and they're feeling like they're stuck in body burnout, struggling to get well, maybe they've tried a bunch of stuff as well and feeling a bit hopeless or stuck. What would be some words of wisdom that you could share with them?
00:49:27:13 - 00:49:41:13
Mel
I would say definitely give this ending body burnout program a go. Go in there with an open mind and relax into it.
00:49:41:15 - 00:50:05:18
Mel
Probably the biggest thing I'd say in general, if you're struggling with health like that, it affects every part of your life. So the kindest thing you can do is invest in yourself and really get to the bottom of your health issues so you can move past it.
00:50:05:20 - 00:50:24:16
Mel
Because it's definitely worth it. And knowing how sick I was three years ago to how I am now, it's sort of hard to believe, to be honest. So yeah, if I can do it, you can do it.
00:50:24:17 - 00:50:25:10
Filly
Yes.
00:50:25:13 - 00:50:27:10
Mel
And it's definitely worth the effort.
00:50:27:11 - 00:50:28:09
Filly
Yeah.
00:50:28:11 - 00:50:32:15
Filly
You are the evidence that healing is possible.
00:50:32:17 - 00:50:34:21
Filly
It's.
00:50:34:23 - 00:51:05:14
Filly
I always this is a bit segway, but I was just looking at PubMed. Sometimes I randomly do, but I was just, like, spontaneous healing. And I was actually surprised at how many research studies came up around chronic illnesses, even like terminal illnesses. And research is kind of like really looking into what's the common theme behind the people who have these, like what look like their miraculous healing experiences, spontaneous healing?
00:51:05:16 - 00:51:28:17
Filly
The very top one was just a belief that that you could be, well, a belief that, you know, even if you are feeling stuck and struggling. I think it's going right back to the start of the conversation. It's like, yes, there was a part that was burnt out from trying to heal, but there was also a very burning part of you that's just like, I can't stay like this any longer.
00:51:28:17 - 00:51:30:20
Filly
I choose not to, and I, I.
00:51:30:22 - 00:51:32:03
Filly
Believe enough.
00:51:32:03 - 00:51:44:21
Filly
That I can be well, and I'm just going to find something that aligns with what I need and, and go all in, which is really what you did beautifully. So thank you so much.
00:51:45:02 - 00:51:47:09
Filly
Yeah.
00:51:47:11 - 00:52:04:22
Chris
Thanks for jumping on, Mel. It's been so nice chatting to you outside of a coaching conversation just to to reflect and and enjoy you celebrate you. So it's been really lovely. Thank you so much for for jumping on and chatting to Filly and I.
00:52:05:03 - 00:52:06:12
Filly
Yeah.
00:52:06:14 - 00:52:08:22
Filly
Breeding hope and healing.
00:52:09:00 - 00:52:12:09
Mel
That's exactly.
00:52:12:11 - 00:52:21:16
Chris
All right. Well thank you everybody for joining us. And we look forward to chatting to you again soon.
00:52:21:18 - 00:52:22:09
Filly
Thank you.
00:52:22:09 - 00:52:31:17
Filly
So much for listening. We so appreciate you. If you'd like to give us extra smiles, drop us a review and spread the love by sharing this episode.
00:52:31:23 - 00:52:50:12
Chris
You can also rate your own state of burnout and the root cause contributors by taking our Ending Body Burnout assessment on our website. And if you're interested in learning about our group or one on one ending body burnout programs, shoot us a DM via Instagram or Facebook. Have the best day ever.
